So much of the time, fear keeps us from doing what we really want to do or saying what we really want to say. But fear is most powerful only when it remains undefined. A vague feeling of fear feels massive and immobilizing. But if you pinpoint EXACTLY what you are actually afraid of, just that act alone will make most of the fear go away. But you have to get VERY specific about it. If you think about leaving your unsatisfying job and it fills you with anxiousness, that level of fear left unexamined could be insurmountable. But if you get ULTRA specific, you can start to dismantle it. “I’m afraid I’ll be even less happy in a new work situation. I’m afraid my father-in-law will think I’m directionless. I’m afraid I could make less money than I do now.” From this starting point, now you can manage. If I make a move and I’m less happy, I could probably get back to a job similar to the one I have now. Why do I even care so much about what my in-laws think? Can I have a conversation about this with my spouse? If I made less money, I could easily make up for it by just eating out less. Is my work happiness worth 2 less restaurant meals a week?

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